In Love With the Wrong Thug by Trenae

Author:Trenae
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-03-01T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 9:

Jazelle

Looking at Boo sleep caused my mind to run wild with evil thoughts. A part of me wanted to wake him up with a wet belt across his fucking face. How dare he snore peacefully like he wasn’t constantly shitting on me? Then, the other part of me wanted to wake him up and ask him what had changed. What was it that made him love me less than he did at first? What did I have to do so that we could get back to that place? Because this right here wasn’t working for me.

I was entirely too young to be stressing the way that I was. Yesterday, I sat in the mirror watching my hair fall out as I combed it and cried. I cried from my soul because although I was in Boo’s house, he wasn’t there with me. I cried because although I was all about Boo, I knew for a fact that he was not all about me. I cried because I found myself losing myself while trying to keep up with Boo. I didn’t know what I liked anymore because I was trying to like the things that he liked. I figured that if we were on a more common ground, then we would have more to speak about since conversation had been shorter than a ghetto bitch’s ponytail.

From the moment I met Boo, I became what I felt like he needed me to be. I guess I was trying to overcompensate for my age. Boo was used to bitches older and more experienced that me, and I just went above and beyond to make him forget about my age.

Unlike Sevyn, I enjoyed school. I made good grades, and school was something that I actually looked forward to. It wasn’t until I met Boo that it changed for me. No longer was I interested in school because it took up the time that I had to spend with Boo away from Lena and DJ’s watchful eyes. They were so strict on me when I first started dating Boo, but I guess they didn’t want to be hypocrites since that’s the way that they met. DJ was older than Lena by like six years, so how could they complain about what Boo and I had going on?

Lena hit the nail on the head when she said they had to back off and let me do me before they fully lost me. If backed into a wall and I was forced to choose, back then I would have easily chosen Boo. Who the fuck was I kidding? I would choose Boo now! I’ve never known love like this. I loved Boo before I even knew what it was to love a nigga. I’ve never felt like someone else’s life was worth more than my own until I met and fell in love with Boo. Why the fuck couldn’t my love be returned to me? I felt my strength draining and knew that the breakdown that I had been trying to avoid was near.

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